From Dreams to Reality

The other night, I dreamed that Midas won the PresDay Qualifier. My feelings when waking up were of pure determination: I want to get my team to win that tournament! This got me to think, then, about how we'll get there. In my humble opinion, at the moment, Midas is probably going to place around 5th, solely based on what I know about the teams attending and how we have played them in the past. The first thing I did upon firing up my computer was research last year's team records for the teams I had no idea about (Okay, so maybe we CAN beat ASU and Chico!).

San Diego State kicked our asses at Stanford Open because we just didn't expect such a high level of physicality from them. But how do you teach a team of girls to want to fight for the disc more? That I am still unsure of. Unfortunately people tend to misconstrue Midas as a team for girls who don't care as much about the sport, and such a mentality becomes increasingly polarizing i.e. the people who care get upset that others don't, and the people who don't feel bolstered by the fact that others share in their mentality. So we'll see. But if short little me can run through D a girl on that team, anyone can.

We lost by one to Pomona at Sectionals. I remember this game was so incredibly frustrating because this was our last game of Saturday, meaning everyone was tired. In short, I recall blaming our loss on our lack of maintaining what is, in my opinion, one of the most important skills on the field, holding the mark. As a whole, Midas loves to throw our zone defense. We're pretty damn good at it when we have the energy, but as soon as our cup starts to get broken, we tend to get very worn out both mentally and physically. Not to say Pomona didn't deserve it, they've got a killer in Mich! But at the same time, they did do worse against other teams than we did, and they had about half the players we did so were probably much more tired than we were. So how will we beat them? Track workouts and better subbing! While it's okay to be tired after a few hard games, it sucks when your top players have been playing so much that they can't hold out to win one more point. I say throw the game against Santa Barbara, and Long Beach, once you see you're going to lose really badly, and save up for the games you should win.

Which brings me to Long Beach. I think these girls will be our biggest challenge. They have become such a dominant team in the past few years. Igloo is pretty much unstoppable, and the other girls have grown to become an amazing support system to let her rip through defenses. I remember when it was enough just to shut her down, and play tough D to force the others to make mistakes. Except now they don't make mistakes. They pretty much dominated our one-day tournament in the fall, and that was without Igloo. I also think those girls are some of the sweetest, most dedicated ones in college ultimate out there; in the end, I think it will be an intense game, but however it ends, the two teams will be hanging out and laughing after. I am still incredibly unsure about how to beat them. I think it'll just depend on how the day goes and what strengths Midas can rely on at the moment. Or maybe we'll get lucky and not have to play them at all.

SLO Motion is also attending this tournament. Having stated my previous feelings about this team, I think Midas' biggest challenge will be to not let them get in our heads. To play out of respect for their skills by shutting them down at every turn. To not get frustrated when they break through our defense, but instead adjust so it doesn't happen again. I'm not sure how many girls still burn after that game at sectionals last year, but I know I do, and hopefully that will help with our desire to win. On that note, I also haven't really seen them play this year so I have no idea what girls are still left on that team or who they picked up. I just really hope we get a chance to play them, but at the same time, I sort of hope we don't have to. I'm not sure Midas is ready to see Angry Ozone so early in the season.

Claremont will probably also be a challenge. Those girls have been incredibly dominant in the past, but simply cursed by the fact that they are in one of the most talented regions in the country. Midas has never really beaten the Greenshirts, but we have definitely had some close games. I am not sure what girls still play on that team though, so don't know what to expect. That means scouting! Actually it means I hope we get to play them early in the season (ideally at SB Invite, but I'm not sure who is going to that), and can use a game like that to figure out how to beat them later.

The last team I think will be a close game will be Humboldt. They came out incredibly fired up this year. They beat BLU split/mixed at Sean Ryan in the fall, so I'm not sure how Midas can hold up. To our credit, they have a small team, so if we play them, I hope it's towards the end of the day, preferably after they lose a really close game (is that bad spirited to say?). I think this will come down to the level of mental fortitude - if we are determined to beat them, we probably have a chance. Otherwise... This is just another game I hope we don't have to actually play.

So how do we get all of these things accomplished? Thank goodness I have friends determined to help me through this season. One of them sent me a blog post of one coach's plan for a semester. Considering Midas really has no coach, Maddox and I are sort of learning as we go. For a team that dreams of dominance, there is no room for mistakes, even early on. So getting any advice from more experienced coaches is always helpful. This entry was amazing, if only because it coincides with what I believe is a good strategy for teaching new topics. Each week introduces a new concept, with emphasis on throwing (for us it will be outside of practice) and scrimmaging frequently. I believe that there is no learning like playing a simulated game. The challenge with scrimmaging is to get people to practice as they would play a real game, but hopefully we'll get there.

You might also notice that I did not discuss any B teams in this post, because I still have full faith that Midas is the best B team in the country and we should destroy any B team that comes across our path. I do want to note, though, that those games can sometimes be the most fun, and I look forward to each and every match, if only for the great halftime games.

Have any advice on practice plans? Know some secrets about these teams that you want to share to help Midas dominate? Here's one of those posts where feedback would be awesome. Help this little girl realize her dreams!

A New Take on Sweating

If any of you have ever worked out with me, you'll know I'm a sweater. As in, I sweat easily, not like an article of clothing. No big deal, really. I get a few odd stares when people first see it, but it's just how it is. Genetics, I guess. Yet when I'm around people I don't know, such as at the gym, it is sort of embarrassing. I mean, when you picture people sweating heavily, you (or at least, I) picture overweight people who are working really hard to do something. It doesn't help that I'm really white and get red quite easily. By now I'm old enough to just tune it out - it really is mostly in my head, but I still feel that twinge of self-consciousness once in a while. After my kickboxing class today, I go to the front desk to get my pass on my way out. The young woman working there says, "Wow, you look like you had a great workout!" I respond, "yeah, I did!" She says, "I wish I could sweat that much when I work out." I stare blankly at her, not sure how to respond. She says "Oh, it's that kickboxing class, huh? It gives you that good of a workout?" I say, "Well, um, yeah, I mean, it's intense, I get really into it, you should give it a try!" She says, "Yeah, I definitely will."

Wait, so a girl is actually envious of my sweaty, red face, and wants to achieve that herself? And she might actually take my advice to doing it? I think it's time to start feeling good about sweating a lot, and take pride in the fact that I'm working hard to get there.

On a semi-related note, going primal has gone well. I felt bad a night or two ago because I sorta cheated. I pretty much got down on a cup's worth of dried cranberries, and would have kept going if there were any more left in the bag. Now, that's a ton of carbs. Feeling dejected, I tell a friend about this at breakfast the next day. He responds with something along the lines of, "Wait, you feel bad for eating some dried fruit?" Good point, I think. Another perk of following this lifestyle - "cheating" involves eating things that aren't too bad for you, but are still delicious. Also, I recently discovered that if I really feel pressured to and/or I want to, I can get away with having some alcohol. Wine is ideal, but if I skip all the fruity fillers, hard alcohol is definitely okay. All in all, I still feel great, and I've lost over 2 pounds already. I hereby deem Primal Week 1 a success! Oh yeah, and I don't miss bread yet. Nope, seriously, I don't. Now get those gingerbread cookies out of my face.

Home is Where This Little Girl's Heart Is

A few nights ago, I drove home from my friend's house just a few miles away at after 1 in the morning. We had just finished watching Inception on his new BluRay player (super awesome). Of course, me being a thinker, and having experienced a super creepy random power outage in the middle of the film, was pretty creeped out on my drive home. I have never driven on a main street where I only see black in my rearview mirror. I speed home, anxious to get in my bed, and as I step out of my car, I look up to the sky. It seemed like every star out that night was ablaze. I could point out some constellations; my favorite was always Orion, as the linearity of the belt just seemed so perfect to me. This experience immediately threw me back to high school, where I would just walk around my neighborhood or even just sit on my driveway and stare at the stars. It's the only place close to civilization I have experienced on a regular basis where you can see the stars on any clear night, regardless of the light pollution. Seeing that night sky, my night sky, made me so incredibly happy to be home. By now I had forgotten my insecurities, and felt warm and safe. Between the time that I got out of my car and got ready for bed, it had begun to rain. I lay awake in bed staring out my window at the rain fall past the streetlights, listening to its pitter-patter on my roof. So relaxing. It's so great to come home to the comfort of the familiar - going to the same gym for workouts I did in high school, driving past the same stores, most of which still stand, the same guys working at the Greek restaurant that still flirt with me, the same punks still sitting outside of the coffee shop because what else do you do on a Friday night in Cupertino. It's also cool to see how new things have become incorporated - new TJ's down the street? Awesome! I can't wait to see my friends. I've been really taking some personal time to destress from this quarter and mentally sort out my life, and haven't had the energy to go be social. But I know when I do, I'm going to really enjoy immersing myself in the throwback.

On an ulti-note: Beware-Ho 14! Everyone should sign up. Now I just need a kickass hat.

Team Planet Express Ship is coming together well. Pretty sure we have a finalized roster and our jerseys are in. Success!

On a I'm-suddenly-pissed-off-Primal-note: My mother just informed me that our chronic ant problem has extended to my almond meal that I bought yesterday. Yesterday. Still a lot left. It's relatively cheap, except, you know, I'm a poor college student. I also got in a stupid fight with my parents yesterday about how they wouldn't even buy eggs as we had ran out since they had eaten them all the night before. Gosh it's so frustrating when, not only do they support me in the cases where it's nothing to them (just go buy some eggs! you need them anyway!) but apparently I'm supposed to know that we'll have ants get into any semi-open container?! And then my mom throws in the little guilt bomb: "yeah, we had to throw away a lot more than just your stuff..." I feel no guilt. Just dislike.

Excuse the little rant, looks like my noon kickboxing class is going to be quite energetic.

Edit: Just found out my class was canceled to be replaced by some stupid holiday 2 hour exercise thing. Sure, I could go. Or I could do what I feel like and mope about it. Considering I was super sick yesterday, guess I'll just take the weekend off. Not my day.

Little Girl's Advice on Pulling

Today a teammate asked me for some tips on how to pull. I wrote up such an extensive response that I felt like I wanted to post it here. Obviously different techniques work for everyone, as I personally have gotten incredibly varying, sometimes even completely opposite, advice over the years. Here's my personal compilation of tips and tricks that work for me.

Message from teammate: "i was wondering if you had any tips on pulling. i tried it out today but my throws were mostly too high and not far enough.
also, i'm a lefty but i had trouble pulling so that the disc would be a OI going from left outside to right inside, sometimes it would even be a OI going from the right outside to left inside, so i think my throwing must be wrong. if you have any tips, that would be great!"

My response: "Okay well first, it's a preference. If you like pulling OI, go for it! I personally pull IO. If you're pulling OI, it means your disc isn't angled enough. To start changing that to IO, throw short, extremely bladey throws. I start very close to vertical (pointing down) when I pull. So grab a partner, get 10 yds away, and just throw blades to get your hand used to holding a disc that way.
Second, don't try to add footwork before you get the throw down. In fact, a lot of people lose momentum when they try to add footwork incorrectly. The idea is to get your weight behind your throw, and all that momentum moving in the direction of the pull. Start by standing stationary facing away from the field, but twisting from the hips. Most shorter throws don't require so much force, but this can help with hucks too. Remember, if you feel off balance, that's okay. On a pull there's no such thing as a "travel." In fact, you ideally want to be falling forward as you pull, as this will get your body traveling down the field and indicates you put so much momentum behind your throw that you launched your body forward.
Once you've got that down and are happy with some increased distance, feel free to try some footwork. The footwork that I was taught (flipped for left-handers) is one step with your left, then the step with your right should turn you should be almost with your back to the field, then the next left step will be your step out and the start of twisting your body. 3 steps. Left, right, left. You can jog up a little before that to get momentum, but build slowly. A lot of pullers find that adding the steps actually takes away from their form. I would get a pull with good form down first, so come game time if you haven't mastered the steps yet, at least you have a pull you can rely on.
As far as throwing the disc itself, you want to think of your arm as like a whip. This is why pulling over and over again (like I had to do last season) really fucks with your elbow. You should be throwing in practically three steps: elbow, hand, wrist flick. Practice doing those steps slowly. Again, the angle of the disc is all about how you release it, so practicing shorter throws will train your wrist to throw how you want. To help with the height, I try to focus on an object across the field. For example, a light post or a tree or something. By eyeing where you want to throw, instead of the sky, that might help. Think out, not up!
But honestly, at the end of the day the pull is just a really hard throw. Get in the gym and do some lifting, or at least do some pushups every day at home to gain muscle."

I'm always looking for more advice, so if you agree, disagree, just want to comment, definitely let me know!

As a total side note, Going Primal day 2 has been a success. It's not that hard cutting out breads and sweets when you realize how delicious meat tastes (to be fair, we'll see how long that sentiment lasts in the coming days). Also, I have rediscovered a great workout in kickboxing. Totally primal, right? Our ancestors totally would have hand-to-hand combat! Today I had 55 g of carbs, and still felt completely energized throughout my whole workout - exciting! Since I know that soon I will be jonesin' for the sweets again, my goal is to put together some primal snacks in the next coming days. First, some trail mix. Next, pie!

Little Girl Has a New Jam

"Wow, I Can Get Sexual Too" by Say Anything

I'm not really sure why, though. Hm.

Little Girl Goes Primal

I've been on and off diets since I had heard of the concept. My parents are, in general, health nuts. I played sports in high school, mostly volleyball, and spent my offseason at the gym. I've been going to the gym (and lifting!) since I was a freshman in high school. My mother tried everything: Atkins, Weight Watchers, you name it. She would consequently impose these concepts on me. I remember there was a few good months where the only carbs in our house were "Atkins" pita bread pockets. My dad was blessed with the metabolism of a horse. To be fair, as he got older, he pretty much stopped eating. Here is my father's daily diet: a bowl of cereal with coffee for breakfast, a soy mocha at Starbucks, one or two pieces of fruit during the day, and dinner. So reading that makes it seem healthy and all, but I don't think I know one college student that can sustain themselves on two pieces of fruit between the hours of 10 AM and 6 PM on a regular basis. Yeah, don't kid yourself. Except when I go to make a sandwich, it's pretty much guaranteed that I hear "are you sure you need to eat that?" This does wonders for my self esteem, I swear. I think the worst it ever got was around my junior year of high school. I had transferred to a boarding school and knew no one. The school was absolutely awful, not challenging or really welcoming in any way. I made friends with a girl who had also transferred that year, who had the interesting ambition to become a news anchor. She was about 4'11" and curvy. Knowing she could never be on television with her body, she had come to adopt her own eating style; in other words, she didn't. Eat, that is. As she and I grew closer and realized we had similar body issues, we became each other's enablers. We each had our own vice; hers was french toast or something, mine was the dining room cupcakes. Knowing each cupcake was about 500 calories, I would go weeks at a time where my daily diet would be a cup of cereal in the morning to get my going, water all day (surprisingly suppresses your appetite for a few good hours), and a cupcake. That was it.

Obviously that is nowhere near healthy eating, and after leaving the school for my senior year, I thankfully realized it. That was about the time my mom was trying Atkins, so I joined in. It actually worked for a little while, but I remember thinking it was so weird that as long as you don't eat the bun, you can order a bacon cheeseburger. That did not seem healthy either. As most people know, it was really only a matter of time before Atkins became linked to all sorts of cholesterol/atherosclerosis problems. At this point I was about 5'3" and weighed around 145. My weight, that stupid number, had always bothered me. Even to this day, I can tell myself it's all about muscle mass and fitness level and whatever, it still bothers me. After my first year two years in college, I gained about 10 pounds, and was up to 155. However The summer going into my junior year I was living with my boyfriend at my house. I was all excited, because I could once again go to my gym, take the classes I liked, cook for myself, etc. I didn't realize how comfortable I had become in my weight range. I got a free health assessment with my registration, and while I laughed when the trainer gave me all their bullshit spiels about how I should pay for personal training and take supplements, I was genuinely shocked at my BFP (around 30%) and what it indicated. I hit the gym hard, starting to go 4-5 times a week for over an hour at a time. That wasn't so crazy, and felt good, but didn't see many results. I decided the next step was to try a lo-cal diet. If Calories In < Calories Spent, you lose weight, right? So I started logging everything, aiming for less than 1000 during the week, and 1200 on weekends. Well, I dropped down to 146 at my lowest weight, but was moody and upset at everything. I almost ruined my relationship because every little thing would set me off. It wasn't until I went back to school and adopted a normal eating schedule that I realized what eating so little had done for me. That led me to probably the most upsetting realization: if I have to eat less to lose weight but I am absolutely miserable when I do so, how will I ever lose weight?

Fastforward over a year later and a friend shows me this blog, Mark's Daily Apple. I immediately become fascinated; a lifestyle that focuses on what the human body is built to digest with workout recommendations that seem more fun than tedious? How are all these success stories really true? Instead of questioning why it may not work, this little girl has decided to give it a shot. Today is my first day of eating primal: first step, try to replace the grains I have come to rely on. Breakfast was a piece of fruit, lunch was eggs scrambled with leftover meatsauce (surprisingly delicious), and for a snack I had some nuts and dried cranberries, and a few slices of ham. Ideally I'd probably eat less fruit, and more veggies, but I think for day 1 I'm doing okay. My goal is in generally to have less than 100 g of carbs, and so far I'm at 59.4. Assuming I'm going to have a meat and veggie based dinner, I'm pretty sure this goal won't be too hard. While I realize I may not be able to incorporate the exercise routines into my daily life (thinking for when I go back to college), I know that with a little commitment I will be able to eat better. Who knows? At least I'll learn some awesome recipes along the way. I'm extra happy today because I get to go to a kickboxing class that I haven't attended since last summer tonight. Good workouts plus improved eating habits; Here goes nothing!

The Job Application Process

Here's what I've figured out so far: It begins with me being all ambitious and fixing up my resume, and ends the second I walk into Coffee Society, grab a coconut chocolate bar and a latte, and sit down in this comfy chair. Updating the blog just seems like so much more rewarding an endeavor than looking up positions I'm just not qualified for. If you're not going to apply for jobs, writing about it seems like the next best thing.

Lately, I feel as if a reminder of the impeding doom of graduation pops up at least once an hour. Graduating used to be a sign of success; with that little piece of paper, the world was at your feet. A recent graduate was young, intelligent, and ambitious. Now, graduates are broke, scared, and desperate. I genuinely did not believe this world would be so bereft of employment opportunities years after the recession began. Even now, as trends are indicating a slow but steady rise in economic standing, jobs seem to be more and more scarce. You hear horror stories frequently of students applying to over 200 positions, to get just a few interviews, and only one offer. For some, that offer is so good it makes all the work worth it. For others, they're grateful to get a management position at their local Target and living with their parents for the next few years.
In a world where good jobs are about as easy to find as that ring you drop down the garbage disposal (seemingly hopeless, possible with some luck, and even then you really get a product not as nice as you had initially expected), what is a young man or woman supposed to do?

So far my answer is work hard, wait, and pray.

Little Girl is a captain!

This year, I am fortunate enough to get to be a captain on what is very arguably the best women's ultimate B team in the nation. It doesn't hurt that I happen to be pretty knowledgeable about the sport of Ultimate. After spending as much of your free time reading articles about how to perfect the mark, practicing pulling, and seeking out advice from those more experienced and more skilled than I, I feel as if I have earned the right to teach the next generation of ultimate girls. That, I suppose, is a good thing, as having no coach means the captains take on a teaching role. Also, as the only senior (though technically not the oldest player) on the team, I feel that if anyone should be telling others how to play, it should be me.

So of course, I'm terrified. What if I instill poor habits in these young, new players (e.g. incorrect throwing form, poor timing on cuts)? What if I get frustrated because things that come so easily to me now are so hard to get others to do (e.g. holding a force, running a proper zone defense)? I really wish I remember the moment where I finally understood how to execute certain tasks. For example, when was the time when I added kicks to my mark? How did it occur to me to even try to do that? Who did I hear from/watch and mimic to get such an idea?

After being on the team for 3 years, I've seen a variety of teaching styles. My freshman year was all about negative reinforcement; I distinctly remember a practice where our coach was so upset that we weren't running hard that we ended practice with an indefinite amount of "suicide" sprints. We ended up doing 25 total, and every 5 or 10 she would say something like "oh, you just dropped the disc! Your turnover means you have to run more!" Perhaps it was because of that year's team dynamic, but I'm not sure how effective that actually was. My next year was a little different, as I spent most of my time working my ass off to become an effective handler. I had spent my rookie season being a "fill," so didn't really touch the disc that much. Sophomore year, I had to learn quick, and became one of our primary handlers starting at sectionals because our two best had decided not to attend. Even then, I had women that had played for 4 years already to look up to and give me advice, so I'm not sure how much the coaches really did. In fact, both of our coaches that year had played as handlers, so I think they spent most of their time trying to figure out how to effectively teach the cutters, leaving us novices in the hands of the grad students on our team. I can't say I believe I was taught anything especially well my third year on the team. Midas only had one solid coach at this point, and he was very into sugar coating all the mistakes the team made. Every response was "it's okay, keep running hard!" I personally do not respond very well to such an attitude; if I mess up, I want to know why and how to fix it. So I started finding information on my own. I began reading articles and seeking out help of older players to perfect new skills. I learned how to pull on my own (which actually ended up being incredibly important as I was one of two players that could do so and pretty much pulled 90% of our points at Sectionals and Regionals). I researched about lifting and started going to the gym on my own. I got faster and stronger, and by the end of the season was able to endure playing almost every point of the series. I just had to. There was no option. Consequently I grew furious at the lack of effort of some fellow teammates: how dare they complain about not getting playing time when I spent every possible waking free moment at the gym or extra practice? Going into spring quarter, before sectionals, the coaches met with every player to give feedback on the season so far and advice for the future. The advice I received was to work on not "tunneling" in to a player (indeed, good advice), but mainly, to work on my attitude. It was too negative and bringing down the team around me. Later that night, after a good cry, I lifted up my chain and vowed to change my attitude. I ended up as MVP that quarter, being lauded not only for my skill and dedication on the field by my commitment to positive thinking for my team.

I know I'm ready for this challenge. My goals for the year are simple: improve as a leader and role model, and get my team to Regionals. Midas deserves to be at Regionals, and not because of some bullshit like last year (we placed 9th at sectionals, there were 8 bids to Regionals, the team that beat us in the game-to-go decided they couldn't afford the trip, so we went in their place). That was easily the lowest point in my ultimate career.

Quick tangent: Midas and SLO have quite the history. After a poor spirited game at some winter tournament my second year, it became our goal to beat them every time in the future. We beat them on universe point at Sectionals, and on universe point again at Regionals. I also had what is to date my most memorable play ever in that game at Regionals (I was lucky enough to get it photographed, and kept it zoomed out because I think the picture is just pretty in general).I jump up to receive some crappy dump pass (the wind was pretty intense in CO that year, for those that remember), bend backward to sky the shit out of this girl, and as I come down she basically shoves me in the back, and I get up and immediately state "Foul!" in her face. She grumpily concedes. We score. Success.

Anyway, ever since then, Midas and SLO have been at odds. Our games are always really intense with questionable calls on both sides. So here comes our last game of Sectionals. It was the game-to-go, and we had had a long, hard fought day. (Won Game 1 against UCSD-B 15-8, Won Game 2 against Occidental 12-7, and Won Game 3 against Redlands 12-6). The scores definitely do not reflect the fact that our starting 7 sat around 5 points total over these games. Anyway, we're on a winning roll, and we're pumped. We start off the game strong, going up 5-1, then 7-3. We're a point away from taking half, but we're obviously a little worn out. They come back and take half 8-7. I remember going into our huddle thinking "we just have to bring the energy back up! We can do this!" I ask the captains if I can give a speech, and they let me, and I probably have never spoken so passionately about ultimate before this moment. Everyone nods, smiles, heads up, and we have a great cheer. We lost the game 15-8. After three separate drops in the endzone, and around the time the score went up 7-12, the coaches pulled me. I think I played the last point, but I basically ran off the field crying.

I have never been so upset as losing that game. That will never happen again. And if it does, it won't be because my team didn't work their ass off. While I have my personal goals for this season, my main goal for the team is to impart the same love for ultimate that I have in all of them. I want my teammates to want to give their all for the same cause that I believe in, to rally back from what seem like sure losses, to make sure that we cause turnovers, and don't rely on the mistakes of others, to respect every opponent for who they are and to beat them by playing our best, and to celebrate every victory as equally as the others. I know that only then will I be genuinely content with whatever the season's outcome is, but for now, I'm just excited for the journey.

And months later...

Of course, I managed to not actually update the blog at all over the summer. Quite silly, seeing as I had an exceptional amount of free time. Yet lack of posts doesn't mean this girl doesn't stop thinking about things, and there have been many thoughts going on that I'll just share now. Hell, it's 11 PM (ish) and I just watched Batman Forever for the first time, and I'm in the mood to ramble on about nothing particularly important.
First, the Fall quarter ended last week. What a roller coaster ride! While having awesome plans every weekend (literally, every weekend) for the past month and a half ensured I was experiencing my senior year in college to the fullest, it also meant I had just that much less time to focus on schoolwork. I, being my ambitious and adventurous self, was convinced I could handle it. Pretty sure the 3 separate colds (including one during finals week) I got this quarter were all stress related. You know, stress leading to a lowered immune system response and all. So basically, I would have some amazing weekend with my friends and/or family and then come right back to school. After 5th week, I just got used to starting every day exhausted. Surprisingly though, I had a very hard time sleeping all the way to my alarm; it wasn't until about 8th week that I didn't wake up before it. I learned a lot this quarter about working in a group, as I might have some of the least efficient group members to deal with. Of course, this project is only my senior design, about equivalent to what would be my "thesis." The concept itself is actually quite cool, I'll probably post about it at some point soon, but picking up the slack for useless coworkers got old, quick. My anatomy class was fascinating - I am really convinced that human biology is my favorite aspect of all bioengineering, especially the focus on muscles.
Speaking of muscles, I actually had a really consistent run of gym time before I started getting sick and midterms came around. I managed to go 3 times a week consistently, and by the time I stopped going I was repping my body weight in back squats! Very exciting. I hope I'll have time next quarter to restart that. There's nothing like the catharsis of kicking your own ass for over an hour. I've also become interested in reading up on new workouts, new theory on exercise and eating, etc. I just got a pass for 7 free days at the 24 Hour Fitness at home, so am lucky enough to get back into working out the fun way - kickboxing!
Back to the classes, my nanotech class was taught by one of the worst professors I've ever had and if he gives me less than a B... I've got nothing. But he'll really suck. The last class I took was a polymer chemistry class that went from easy and interesting to hard and memorization based. I loved my professor though, and even felt bad when I did poorly on homeworks, like I was letting her down. So we'll see how all these academics turn out.
Next quarter I'm taking Organic Chemistry Lab, which is apparently a soul-sucker. I'm also taking the next quarter's class of senior design, which ends with us presenting our project at the annual biotech symposium at the end of the quarter. The team with the best presentation gets to have their name on a plaque in the engineering building, forever staking your claim on campus. I can only dream of winning that competition, but am determined to help make my group serious competitors. The third class I'm taking is my last required engineering class! Very exciting. I've had a hard time in this professor's class before, but he uses the same textbook as the one I used for my anatomy class so I'm hoping the overlap will be enough to get me a kickass grade. Finally, I decided to sign up for a 2 unit technical communications class, where we basically work on our writing. As an engineer, I feel as if my writing skill has seriously deteriorated. I used to love writing, and felt very proficient at it in high school. Since coming to college, I've found I now feel more comfortable writing mathematical equations than essays. If I ever plan to be an attorney, this obviously needs to change, so why not take a refresher class now while I have to pay for tuition anyway?
As far as ultimate goes, I ended up not making the A team this year (my thoughts on this later). Captaining Midas is looking to be quite the endeavor. For the first time since its inception, Midas will not have a coach. This means we need to find someone to call lines. My co-captain, Maddox, and I will be writing every practice. The captains, but especially me as I am the only senior on the team, will be taking on teaching roles. I think overall these changes are all for the better. Not having a coach is the biggest hurdle to overcome, as far as who will call lines at tournaments and keep general order about the team. However, now Maddox and I are free to shape the team as we will. For example, we decided not to attend two tournaments in a row to start the quarter, but instead to mandate our teammates sign up for LeiOut, this epic beach tournament. Not only do they get in fun playing time, but they get introduced to the ultimate community outside of UCLA, an opportunity most people don't know even exists until they are prodded to participate. The captains also get the chance to decide what we want to teach. There have been significant communication issues in the past, where the coaches sometimes just don't understand/don't want to hear that they are wasting their time with certain drills or concept teaching. Either way, captaining is going to be a great test of my leadership skills and hopefully a learning opportunity. At the end of the day, I'm happiest working my ass off on the field, no matter who I'm playing with. I might also try my hand at some posts about ultimate stuff, even though I'm not sure if I'm the most informed person to be postulating for the community at large.
Tomorrow I go home to see my family for the first time since summer. That will be nice. I will be spending this break applying to jobs for after graduation, which is sorta exciting, and anxiety inducing. And looking back over this post, I feel as if there's so many things I want to write about now. So there will be more posts to come, I swear. Hopefully they'll actually have a point to them. Also I intend to start posting some workouts, so look out for that!

Introspection

My boss asked me to write a short essay about my goals for the summer. After struggling for a very, very long time, I came up with the following. Regardless of the fact that my boss never asked to read it, I was still happy I was able to finish it, and figured I would share it here.
My reasons for wanting a career in law are simple. Lawyers are wealthy, powerful, intelligent, and generally well respected. Years of a competetive environment and high family expectations fostered a need to excel, to become someone with the aforementioned traits. I performed will in high school so I could get into a good college and further my progress towards the lifestyle I desire. I currently attend a prestigious university, studying an innovative and lucrative discipline. Until recently, I told myself and whoever that asked that I planned to combine my goal of becoming a lawyer and my bioengineering major with a career in intellectual property law. I can recall a very specific moment that I realized I had no idea what the process to becoming a patent lawyer actually entails. There is a possibility that my hard work in my current studies has really little effect on my becoming a lawyer at all. I decided I had been in denial about the fact that being a lawyer requires more than a respectable undergraduate degree. It thus became my goal this summer to learn as much as possible about the life of a lawyer; this includes everything from daily life to law school experiences. I want to meet real clients and find out what court is really like, as opposed to assuming it resembles some dramatic TV show. After this summer, I imagine myself able to feel more prepared than any other first year law student who expects to become the next Jack McCoy. I hope my experiences will ultimately aid me in my goal of becoming a successful lawyer.
Who knows? Maybe I'll look back on this in a few years and realize how insightful I was after all...

Summer 2010

Upon, well, really not that much prodding, I've decided to start writing in this blog again. Here's a little background on what has happened since my last post (early July 2009).
I've recently finished my third year at UCLA, and finally broke the 3.0 cumulative GPA barrier. For those of you out there who don't know what I'm talking about, I shall explain. For the past year, my cumulative GPA has gone from a 2.98, to a 2.99, to 2.994. No joke. Instead of just rounding up to 3.0, the system just added decimals. Really annoying, as I had to have had a 3.0 GPA to take this one class in Spring. That's a topic for another time. After toiling incredibly hard and keeping very long hours, my new cumulative GPA is 3.024. Success!
By Spring Break (late March) I knew I would be spending my summer in Eugene, Oregon, with my boyfriend. I thus needed to find a job to occupy my time, and hopefully make some money. Keeping with my desire to have a career in law, I spent my break cold-calling lawyers in the Eugene area. The vast (as in, all but one) responses were along the lines of "Oh, a third year UNDERGRADUATE? We only take law school students" or "we have no position for you at this time, but feel free to submit a resume!" I like to call that one the easy-let-down. Some people don't know how to say no. Anyway, I get a call back from a message I had left with this one attorney saying he was very interested in working with me over the summer. I went for an interview and was invited to return to work part time, unpaid, but experience life as he does. So far I have been assigned readings from texts that are studied in law schools and have met with a client. That's just after one week.
I intend to make this summer's blog about my experiences in the big bad world of law. What do I get to do every day? What are some insights I grasp from assigned reading? On the side, did I do anything interesting in Oregon? Goodness knows, I am NOT used to the small, quaintness of a town like Eugene, but am very interested in exploring what it has to offer.
See you at the Oregon Country Fair!